The sun is coming up announcing a new day, and already I’m filled with dread. My night has been one of those restless ones where your mind is going ninety miles an hour, and more than normal time in the bathroom. The sun coming up should make me feel a blessing rather than a burden. But it seems there is always this battle with a little depression and wonder.
As I take my blood sugar and get ready to choke down all those pills, I look out the glass door in the back and wonder where is the joy when dawn brings this new day? Sometimes it seems like a struggle just to get up and stagger into the kitchen. Many times I am weary and ticked off that this old body fails me. I would just love to be able to do what I use to do… walk, run, help out around the house… and go fishing. Back in the day, with about 90 pounds on my back, I would do a 25 mile force march twice a month. We would run around Camp Lejeune with each squad carrying telephone polls – teaching us team work. One hundred sit-ups and fifty pull-ups. Those days are forever gone.
And so I pray: O Lord, give me grace to meet every challenge that comes my way today. Give me the strength to be better rather than bitter. Turn my despair into delight. Even when my hands fumble, I will fold them in prayer to you. Though my mouth struggles to make sense, help me share a smile with someone coming my way. Help me to never be too old to continue to grow in grace. Bring on this new day, O Lord, and help me be a positive part of this day for me and others. Amen.